Friday, December 23, 2005


Going to town the other day, I was walking next to a tall gangly guy who does nothing all day but staring ahead and walking down the road to the end and then turning round and coming back up again, when I passed an old lady with her hair in two plats and two bright red circles on her cheeks, clinging onto a teddy bear. On the other side of the road there was a guy having a strole, wearing a pink dressing gown and a big straw hat with big plastic flowers stuck on top, nodding in the direction of a surprisingly normal-looking guy who can go through sixty different facial expressions per minute, staring at a big girl with an overpowering smell of vinegar, with headphones on and music blaring out, shouting at some frightened Japanese tourists for no particular reason.
Yes, there definitely seems to be an overabundance of nutters in our neighbourhood.
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely have nothing against nutters. And I even believe that to be able to function properly, a neighbourhood needs a couple of nutters just as much it needs a bus stop, a chemist, a post office and a Chinese takeaway.
Now we have more than a couple, a lot more than a couple actually, which is great. The more the merrier, that’s what I say.
What does worry me though is that if we have so many here, there must be other neighbourhoods out there with no nutters at all. So in this season of goodwill, I have been thinking about how other neighbourhoods such as ours, with such richness of nuttiness, can share their great blessing with other, less fortunate areas of the country.
To start off this great spreading of joy, I’m offering my own services to any nutter-deprived neighbourhoods that might be interested (I come complete with a purple wig and a yellow pair of flares with red and blue flowers on them).
Let us hope there will come a time when every neighbourhood in the United Kingdom will have at least two nutters they can call their own.
Amen

9 comments:

Anahita said...

can i be a nutter too?......i dont hvae a purple wig but i do have a big box of "khormaloo"..will that do?
um sorry just finished a 15 hour shift and getting ready for 2 more tomorrow and xmas day..boohoooooo have a fun time whatever ur up to!

amanda kay said...

you can be my neighbor anytime. you can live two houses down, and you'll fit right in. on the south side of me is my neighbor who enjoys knitting while talking angrily to herself (i consider her a kindred spirit) and on the north is bob, who comes home every day from work and picks up any leaf, branch or other that falls on his lawn and on saturdays, sweeps the street. yes, the street, and yes, we have machines that do that for us. but saturdays would not be the same without that swish swish of his broom, like clockwork. your yellow flares would fit right in.

on a totally unrelated subject, i successfully made shivid polo, and i'll have you know my tah dig was exceptional; effectively disproving the notion that you must have a persian gene to correctly make it. i also made tah cheen. hpb says there is nothing left to do now but get married, and for that he blames you.

Em said...

I would like to be a nutter too but onli for day..My only req is that my wig be hot pink.So can that be done..Anyways.. hapi holidays n take care

Foulla said...

Amen..
welcome back and happy new year;)

Shirin said...

Anahita, O’ honey that sounds bad. I bet you’re looking forward to February when you and your box of khormaloo are getting some time off. Or have you gone and found yourself a job for then as well? Anyway you can come and join me anytime and don’t worry about not having a wig; I have a green one you can borrow.

Amanda, Wow! I don’t know what to say. You have made me so proud darling. I guess now when you come here it’s going to be you teaching me a thing or two about Persian cooking ;-) Did you use the safran I sent you? Tahchin is very impressive.

Em, consider it done. I promise you I will get hold of a hot pink wig for you no matter what.

Foulla, Happy New Year to you too ;-)

amanda kay said...

hehehe i had the best sensei. i haven't received anything from you yet, i need to recheck my mail as all the junk is piling up. i'll let you know.

merry christmas to you and kamyar.

Tazzy said...

Good to have you back :)

Happy Holidays!

Anonymous said...

Hi there Shirin - just saw ur site for illustrations - love the style. just thot would drop a line. Saw Kamyar's photblog too - u guys rock.

Shirin said...

I can’t believe your prezie hasn’t arrived yet Panda Pants. I sent it ages ago so it would get to you by Christmas :-( Hope it gets there soon.

Hi there Tazzy :-) Happy holidays to you too.

Thanks a lot Anonymous :-) I’m flattered.
Merry Christmas