Monday, December 26, 2005
You know what I said before about Christmas being all about shitty presents? Well I like to take that back please because yesterday I remembered exactly what Christmas is all about: eating.
There is something Iranians do when they hold their hand in a karate style and with it touch their neck repeatedly saying, ‘Thank you but I can’t take another bite because I’ve eaten up to here.’
Well yesterday I experienced exactly how that feels when I took one bite of this extremely delicious chocolate cake that my cousin had made and realised that it literally had nowhere to go! This was after two helpings of Turkey with all the trimmings (one and a half actually because the second helping was quite small), one slice of cheese cake and some trifle.
Not bad you might think, but I was disappointed with myself. You see, whenever I go some place where the main activity is going to be eating a lot of delicious food, for some reason I always end up eating a lot less food than I had planned to. After thinking long and hard about the reasons why this is, I came to the conclusion that this happens only because as soon as I arrive somewhere (yes I know; I really do need to get a life but until then this is the sort of thing that I will spend my time thinking about) I start picking at things (all the lovely nibbles the hosts have put out) and so come dinner time, shock horror, I’ve lost my appetite! And can only have one and a half portions instead of five! Awful, don’t you agree?
‘So’ I said to Kamyar yesterday morning as we hit the M40 on our way to London, (desperately trying to find a comfortable sitting position with my heels getting stuck in the carrier bag in front of me with my boots in it; in case I tripped in my heels and twisted my ankle or something and a map balanced on my knees), ‘I’ve worked out exactly what I need to do.’ A little pause. ‘This time I’m not going to pick’ I said, ‘I’m not even going to have one little thing because that’s how it all starts’ and then in my most determined voice I added, ‘I won’t eat a thing until dinner time.’
Alas they had a big bowl of nuts; I relapsed straight away. Now I have to wait another year.
Tuesday, 27 December 2005
I just saw a few spelling mistakes on here and corrected them. I’m sorry if you have already read this and thought it didn’t make sense.
Posting stuff after a few drinks just isn’t a good idea. But then again it’s Christmas init ;-)